6 ways of managing a long-distance relationship

LDR sounds like a municipal transport system, doesn’t it? I was told that it stood for Long Distance Relationship – something that can be every bit as draining as a rammed commuter service.

Many of us who choose to work overseas will also have to choose between work and relationships. This is tough. Actually, it’s bloody awful. But that’s how it is.

In some cases, the LDR will be allowed to trundle on in stop-start fashion, like the crowded train into work (will end the transport analogies now). So here are very simple ways of keeping a very complicated dream alive:

  1. Keep talking. Two-way communication is vital. Fortunately there are apps that can keep the conversation going, from WhatsApp to software designed with couples in mind, but I’d suggest voice calls. Txt msgs r not rmntic.
  2. Encourage visits. It has to work both ways. Once a year (probably) isn’t enough. Pay for the air ticket if you have to – after all, you’re the one buggering off to pastures new.
  3. Entertain yourself to, ahem, release the pressure. You can probably work out what I mean. But do avoid dalliances with others, however tempting. It’s wildly common, in my experience, and a recipe for disaster. There is an exception: if you have secured your partner’s consent (see 1). And yes, I do know people who have gone down that path…
  4. A good way of remaining a good boy or girl is to hang out with mates you can trust. Socialise with the right people therefore.
  5. Never forget important dates – birthday, Valentines, seasonal celebrations and the like. Forgetting a big day can be a heart-stopping moment.
  6. Keep yourself occupied. It will take your mind off the stress of keeping the LDR going. Build that business, climb that mountain, knit that scarf.
But ultimately, do LDRs actually work? What do the experts think?

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